If you have a lack of boundaries you become available to be pulled by everyone else’s opinions, expectations and judgements
When we are not clear about who we are and tangled up in who we “think” we should be in order to keep everyone else pleased, constantly trying to mould ourselves into “this or that” and always aiming to be seen as the “nice one” because being nice is what “good people” do
Butttttttt what ends up happening is you’re feeling burnout, overwhelmed, frustrated, resentful and at times feeling like “it’s all too much”
“Yes that’s exactly how I’m feeling Laken”.....
Babe I get it, I’ve been there too but here’s the thing..
“We teach people how to treat us” and when we are constantly over giving, over functioning and putting others needs before our own what we are essentially saying is “I don’t know who I am” and I allow everyone and anyone to occupy my space, time and energy.
I want you to think for a second, imagine being able to speak your truth like actually say what you want to say and not have to live in the world of feeling guilty or worried about other people ‘not liking you’
Cause here’s the thing at the core of poor boundaries we have a set of beliefs that if we lay down a boundary people will get mad at us, abandon us or even reject us
I’m here to tell you, those beliefs are not serving you….
It is actually the complete opposite and having sexy, strong and solid boundaries has your relationships be SAFE!!!!
Now wait I know you might be thinking “Laken how is this true, boundaries seem harsh and even a bit bitchy?”
I’m about to explain..
When we have super sexy boundaries, we know who we are, we are getting our needs met and we are strong in our own internal structure.. We actually have more energy, clarity, self expression and a knowing of what's okay for us and what's not okay!!! We feel more ALIVE!!!!!
Because when we know more of who we are, we speak honestly, we communicate better and therefore create HEALTHIER relationships. In these types of relationships people never have to guess where they stand with you, they never have to question who they need to be around you which has it create a deeper level of safety and builds epic trust
Are you ready to have laser clear boundaries?
Let me just quickly break it down for you on what we put up with internally and externally when we do NOT raise the bar for ourselves..
On one hand we become the ‘people pleaser’ we give and give ourselves to others expecting them to see…… yerp what we mentioned before how ‘NICE’ we are. We over step our boundaries, say yes when we want to say no and we train people that they can always rely on us cause we will do anything to make sure other people are happy
Now let’s look at the other hand - anger, frustration, resentment and hostility festers in the background, overtime it builds more and more momentum until we finally ‘snap’ because we have overstepped our boundaries for far to long and created inner conflict
In this program I am going to teach you everything that transformed my life to be a woman who is living from her power and what I have learnt, studied and teach with creating healthy, gorgeous boundaries.
Imagine taking off all the masks of who you think you're supposed to be and living from your power…
There used to be a time in my life where I believed I was just a ‘Mum, Partner, Friend, Worker’ and I was always “care taking for other people’s emotion”, giving and giving because ‘that was my job’ (ugh even writing that makes me cringe)
BUT
I thought I HAD to, that was my role and if I didn’t live up to those expectations i was ‘bad’..
What I come to realise is that I had set up relationships in my life to be very lopsided, I had created unspoken agreements about how I would BE in the relationships and I become way too invested in other people’s lives (Mrs Highly Co-dependant & Overfunctioner) BOOM!!!
FYI that isn’t a good thing…
I didn’t understand why they couldn’t see how much i was always helping them, doing things for them and always being available to them.
Why were they so selfish? Couldn’t they just be grateful for all I do? Why can’t they return the favour?
While on the surface it looked innocent and everyone else around me was happy because they were getting THEIR needs met through me being ‘nice’ i was becoming resentful, angry and a switch would flick within me. I would then become rude, arrogant and withdraw..
I would throw an ‘adult tantrum’ either directly or indirectly - abusing, yelling and having emotional breakdowns (it was NOT healthy) then i would feel ‘bad’, ‘guilty’ and ‘shame’
So i then tried to ‘fix’ it and guess what???
I then become a PEOPLE PLEASER again and again, give and give..
It was like a rollercoaster that I could never get off and had trained people that this was acceptable...
My internal boundaries were so wobbly and I was so lost. I just wanted to find me again…
How do you even begin to find yourself again?
Firstly it starts with a willingness to accept where it is you are currently at right now and knowing you have been doing the best you can..
We were not taught how to have sexy, strong and solid boundaries. It is a skillset we learn and develop to become the person we know we are here to be
Who is this for?
You struggle to say “no” to people and draw a boundary
You’re a mum, you DEFINITELY want to do this.. Why? Cause your kids eyes are on you! If you want them to have a high bar for themselves where they really know their own needs then YOU have to be demonstrating a high bar for yourself
You’re not sure about your own needs, desires, preferences and wants in life
You are tired of being tired and over giving at the expense of yourself
You’re reading this page and it resonates with you.. then follow that nudge!
You are ready to take back control of your life and learn to be really dialled into “what’s your stuff” and “what's their stuff”
Who Is This NOT For?
I’m going to be blunt. I'm really clear on who I choose to not work with, people who play the victim, whinge, moan and complain about the results they aren’t getting. People who blame everyone else for what they have or don’t have. I’m not the right Coach for you. Even if you pay me! Cause there ain't no amount of money that’ll have me lower my own bar. I do not enable this type of behaviour in any areas of my life.
So if you’re a person who’s bar is set low and looking through the world that people “owe you” and you will chuck “adult tantrums” to try and get your own way, then don't sign up for this program. I was only able to raise my own bar when I was willing to let go of the BS holding me back (including the victim and blame I was operating from) and fully creating my results and living in my power.
What You'll Be Learning and What We'll Be Covering
Raising the bar so that you are dialled into where you’re standards are set at and need them to be to experience the freedom that you’re after
BOUNDARIES BOUNDARIES BOUNDARIES!!!! What are boundaries, why do we need them, how to protect them
Being dialled in to your own needs, wants, desire, preference
How having sexy, strong and solid boundaries creates sexy, strong and solid relationships and busting the myths that boundaries threaten relationships. It is actually the complete opposite!
Boundary myths – Beliefs that you may have adopted that boundaries are rude, arrogant and selfish, it’s total BS and we are going to break it all down
Communicating your Boundaries and the language to really deliver what it is you trying to say in a way that is loving and kind
Types of boundaries we have, breaking down all the areas from physical, mental, emotional and material
Guilt - Fear - Judgement we are going to DIVE into these and unpack them like a MOFO
How to communicate your NO and how to not getting pulled by other people agendas or upsets
Being the one who goes first in creating an extraordinary life with high level healthy beautiful boundaries, joy, freedom and vitality
We go ALL IN on People Pleasing, what has had you driving all the people pleasing, knee jerking your ‘yes’, overgiving, over functioning
The difference between non-negotiables and preferences.. and HOW to have a non-negotiable BE a complete NON-NEGOTIABLE!!!!
I’ll teach you how to “get into the arena” , play the game IE LIFE, that builds a strong internal structure within yourself, and actually have this BE FUN!!!!!!!!
You will have a whole new skillset, toolbox and awareness to see when you slip back into lowering your bar and what to do IN THE MOMENT to reset back to your new set bar
You’ll learn to recognise ‘warning signs’ you’ll be able to identify where your boundaries have been poor, and you’ve been operating out of the old people pleasing pattern ( warning sign moments can be when your feeling frustrated or angry and are actually nuggets of gold for your growth)
You’ll develop ways to strengthen your BACKBONE. WOOHOO.. Being a woman who is so solid in who she is being that no one can pull or sway her
What it ‘you teach the world how to treat you’ really means! This is a juicy one where you will get to see how it is relationships have been set up and you’ll discover how this has affected you in the past and how you choose for it to be different in your future
The lies we tell ourselves and how we do not give power to our words. Internal boundaries are so IMPORTANT we are going to uncover what it means to become someone that when the bar is raised you show up regardless
How to raise your SELF LOVE inner GPS and how to partner yourself through the journey with a lot of compassion, love and kindness. Sometimes it’s about forgiving yourself, and going easy on yourself, as you also have the internal boundaries to be able to show up for yourself in the way that will make the changes that you truly want
HIGH LEVEL SELF CARE is a form of deep courage to yourself. If you’ve been in the habit of not caring for yourself, then this is going to change!
It’s time to let go of any guilt you have felt around high level self care and actually have you become a person who is showing up DAILY for herself and filling up her cup. When your cup is full you can pour from the overflow
Creating your own personal zen den - Super sacred space, time and moment for you that allows you to really keep the bar set at a high standard, having this zen den will give you time to go inward and reset for yourself this new level of you and keep it at the highest capacity.
How to protect your energy! This is so important to be able to have your energy full and not being zapped and depleted by others. You will learn key tools, modalities and ways to be able to recharge and restore your energy level and know when it’s time for a pick up if they are running low
What Others Have to Say
Working with Laken has been one of the best decisions I have made. I feel truly energised stepping into my power and leadership in my life.
If you have any doubts or something holding you back from working with Laken now is the time to sit down and figure out a way through it, because working on you for you will be such a game changer.
I am so thankful for everything Laken has guided me through over the last 6 weeks. So thankful I have commit to another 3 months because I have big things coming 🎉✨
BRING ON THE BREAK THROUGH!!
Laken was patient and encouraging, I experienced some major transformational shifts.
I learned a lot about myself and I would finish the sessions feeling exhilarated, lighter, inspired and looking at things from a different perspective.
I apply the learnings that Laken helped me to discover through our coaching sessions, pick myself up and try again, remembering that it’s not an event but an ongoing process. I am forever grateful that I took the step of investing in myself with her.
Are You Ready?
BUTTON: YESSSS! IM READY TO RAISE MY BAR
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